One of the great things about my girlfriends is that we know how to have a great time, and we all accept the quirks in each other that allow us to let loose and enjoy ourselves. (See Blog #30: Hibiscus) There is no judgement, no talking behind backs, no bitchiness. There is acceptance and love.
On one girls’ trip, the five of us were boating on Lake Michigan. We rented a small yacht for the day, complete with our own captain. Before we embarked on our journey, Cappie ran down a bunch of rules that we were supposed to follow. He emphasized the most important rule of all: Never, ever, jump off the boat while the motor is running. (Something about getting chopped up by the motor blades.) Yea, yea, ok. We got it. Let’s go. Cappie was so taken with our cute little group that he offered to take us out on an evening cruise for free. (Well, not free. Just “free” on top of what we had paid him for the day.)
So Cappie drove us around as we drank, soaked up the sun, enjoyed the view, and waved at other boaters. We were having a great time. After about two hours of consumption, a boat full of fun-looking people drove by us, and then drove by us again. We got about 200 yards away from them and we started talking/yelling at each other. Friendly banter. And then I saw it. A margarita machine. And lots of tequila. And that was all it took. With our boat still motion, the blades of the motor still churning, I climbed up to the ledge on the side of the boat and jumped over the side. I was overboard. I swam over to my new friends’ boat and climbed aboard, ready for a drink.
New Friends…and Margaritas
Cappie was furious. But he pulled out boat alongside our friends’ and allowed the rest of my girlfriends to climb aboard easily, without getting wet. Huh, imagine that. Look what can happen when you are patient. (But if I were patient, we wouldn’t have this great story, would we?) We hung with our new friends for about an hour. Ali took a JetSki ride with a complete stranger for about 20 minutes and returned (thank goodness). And then we went back to our own boat. Before we took off, our new friends invited us to a party on their boat that night at the docks. Sounded good to us, because Cappie made it clear that after I broke Rule #1, he wasn’t going to do us any favors that night. We were done.
After dinner, we took an Uber to the docks and found the boat party. It seemed harmless enough. A few guys and girls upstairs having beer. Some smoking cigarettes. Some smoking….something else. We partook in the drinks and smokes, and I tried to make small talk with one of the girls on board. I soon realized she was a working girl; she was being paid to be there. Well, that’s awkward. Meanwhile, the other girls were looking for some snacks and found some Triscuits. Meri walked over to Alex and said, “This Triscuit will fuck you up.” Alex, of singular mind, said, “Is it a pot Triscuit?” She grabbed the cracker and shoved it in her mouth. Immediately her mouth felt like cement and she screamed, “Do you hate me?” Apparently Meri didn’t mean it would fuck you up in a good way.
In Over Our Heads
Alex went on the lookout for something to wash down the not-pot Triscuit. All she could find was hot beer, and that’s what it had to be, so she washed it down. Meanwhile, Meri had to go to the bathroom, so she walked down below deck. When she came back, she was in a panic. “We have to get out of here right now! We have to leave!” Apparently the girls for hire were snorting cocaine and eating out each other downstairs.
We politely thanked our host and took off for the city. Yes, we definitely were in way over our heads. Frightening while we were there, for sure. But we got out alive, so now it’s funny.